Pearce is a Cunt

[Cunt Detector]

Thoughts?

[George Lupton]

Agreed

[Carol Vordermans vibrator]

[rimmer]

Backs up my earlier dig Michael.

You can't argue with someone who detects cunts for a living can you?

[pearce10]

Wear a name badge on the night rimmer,just so people know who you are,after all you haven't been on the scene for a while and its not like you where a premier league player even in you're prime!unlike my good self


*polishes division one championship medal*

[rimmer]

Having made 2 appearances myself that season I expected a medal myself. But then I suppose, like you, I was just a passenger on the Championship Train, others drove that locomotive.

[fao M Pearcesouth lancs admin]

Hi Michael,thanks for you're e-mail,yes,you are indeed one of only 6 players to have lifted 2 league titles for Parbold FC,you are also one of a handful of players who has played in all 4 divisions,you were also right in thinking Paul Mackenzie was not one of these players.I am also able to confirm you're 5 goals from midfield was only 1 short of Pauls tally of 6 in the 2005/6 season which he achieved whilst playing in the 3rd division and whilst 6 years you're junior!I think Michael,that's its clear to see,there's only one winner in this race

[Cunt detectors bum chum]

Thanks for that last post Mrs Pearce.

[rimmer]

I could resort to comments such as - 2 Player of the Year trophies, 1 Manager's Player of the Year and 3 consecutive promotions all before the age of 22.

Or ask questions such as - wasn't it Paul Mack that single-handedly brought Parbold back in the noughties after they folded, becoming treasurer, secretary and pitch marker whilst simultaneously helping them towards Championships and promotions?

Or my personal favourites - who's the only player to score for Parbold in a cup final? Didn't Paul keep a clean sheet in his solitary game in goal?

But we all know a man's worth is not his medals or trophies, but how he served his club. With that in mind, let me ask you this question Pearce, if that is your real name . . .

Weren't you part of the group that decided to rip Parbold away from it's rightful home Alder Lane? I gotta tell you, wouldn't want that as my legacy.

*Puts his hands in his pockets, smiles, and walks away*

[The accountant]

A question for you my brown tongued friend; you'd have kept us at alder lane were we paid a fortune to the terrible council and got nothing in return? Not even a changing room?

Your negotiating skills are muck and your logic even worse! Small time people stuck in the past may be happy changing in a portacabin, the cherry stars of today plying their trade in the top division certainly arent hence the move to a ground with state of the art facilities and a bog!

I can only assume that playing on a flat pitch with no mole hills would only expose your lack of technical ability. You'd obviously be fucked if you had no bumps and divets to hind behind - it is always a bad sign when your second touch is a tackle!

The move has enabled us to save costs, invest in the club infrastructure and allowed us to invest even more heavily in our renowned youth policy which is now paying rich dividends. It has also allowed the club to cover the costs of tirrells and murrays fines - no mean feat in itself!

This season you will see the cherries become even more of a force in the Premier league.

[Dickless McDickarse]

Thank you accountant for proving Rimmers point.

The players of today are all for the luxury and the perks of the job, comfy changing rooms, toilets etc. I bet they even expect that expensive quilted toilet paper instead of Alder Lane's usual 'shit removal knife'.

They pay little heed to the Parbold faithful who's team has been all but destroyed by it's senseless move to St. Bede's.