|
|
Post by Mr Defence on Dec 16, 2008 13:34:41 GMT
This is an urgent message in request of our strikers, whom are currently missing in action (whearabouts unknown).
Last known mission,
GO ONTO THE PITCH AND SCORE GOALS.
Jason Heeley (failed), last seen a couple of months ago.
Jeff McFarlane (failed), havnt heard much from him in about 3 years.
Mike Pearce (failed) Punched above his weight a couple of years ago, hasnt been seen in the penalty area for many months now.
Young David its over to you mate, can you save us ?
|
|
|
|
Post by David on Dec 17, 2008 14:28:26 GMT
Im Ready And Reporting For Action......SIR!  |
|
|
|
Post by Young Heeley on Dec 17, 2008 14:42:01 GMT
Id Be Honoured to Lead The Strike Force, Just Say The Word.
|
|
Professor Emmet Brown
Guest
|
Post by Professor Emmet Brown on Dec 18, 2008 9:15:36 GMT
sorry david but we are unable to say the word just at this present time. im afraid you dont fit our psychological or physical profile of the type of striker we currently employ.
we are only on the lookout for strikers with no movement, no pace & no eye for goal.
having conducted some quantum scientific research I have concluded that you would only upset the balance of our current strikeforce by introducing pace, movement and clinical finishing into the mix. introducing too much of any of these qualities would mean that parbolds goals for column would increase at a rate of knots. this in turn would lead to parbold pciking up more points & therefore moving up the league table. im afraid to stop this catastrophic chain of events from occurin we have no option but to keep you in the same positon of left/right wing where you can happily set up chances for our current strikers but they can keep missing them so as not to set off the aforementioned chain of events. this means that everyone associated with parbold can rest assured & sleep well safe in the knowledge that we will never move up in the league &can keep on getting beat by limited teams as is currently the case.
this will be my recommendation to the current management team but i think they are currently on the same wavelength as me.
Prof E Brown PHD, YMCA, BHS, AA, RAC
|
|
|
|
Post by Rafa Benitez on Dec 18, 2008 15:06:17 GMT
what a good idea,a centre forward that can score,I actually think this could be a good idea,it might just work. If  only someone told me before I bought that fuckin oirish cunt |
|
|
|
Post by Georges Dog on Dec 18, 2008 15:34:34 GMT
I agree David would make a good striker, put him left back on sunday  Woofff!! |
|
|
|
Post by sicknote furlong on Dec 18, 2008 19:49:37 GMT
No movement? Check.
No pace? Check
No eye for goal? Check
Straight back into the team for sicknote.
|
|
|
|
Post by Kevin Cambell on Dec 19, 2008 16:06:44 GMT
Coming from a close source i've heard that Parbold FC is looking for a striker, I am willing to come out of retirment and unhang my boots and put on the proud red shirt of the cherries, no wages, no signing on fee or goal bonus, 1 condition i have the number 9 shirt, if interested just contact my agent.
|
|
mabs cross centre half
Guest
|
Post by mabs cross centre half on Dec 19, 2008 16:16:53 GMT
why dont you give that pearce fella a go up front?he tore us a new arsehole a few months back?strange to see he has only played up front twice since??
|
|
|
|
Post by poker on Dec 19, 2008 18:45:36 GMT
Mabs Cross Centre Half, you are Michael Pearce and I claim my £10.
|
|
only someone told me before I bought that fuckin oirish cunt